


Falling

by ioweyouaphonebox



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-26
Updated: 2013-06-26
Packaged: 2017-12-16 06:28:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 1,536
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/858917
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ioweyouaphonebox/pseuds/ioweyouaphonebox
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Castiel is slowly losing his grace.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Him and the Winchesters

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so tell me what you think. Add comments :D

Falling is just like flying.  
Losing his grace was the most unexpected way Castiel thought heaven would use as a punishment.  
Being with the Winchester's has it's perks, and being with Dean was honestly the only thing that keeps him alive. It doesn't matter how unrealistic it may seem. And somehow he understands that their relationship ,helps Dean too, if only a bit.  
The hunter had and will always be there for him. Always willing to help no matter the cost or for what. His electric green eyes blazed slightly when Castiel would tell him about what heaven did to him or earth and whenever he talked about what heaven was planning on doing, or sometimes they filled with concern and a hint of sadness and he stayed close to him.  
He remembered an old expression, that stated how actions spoke louder than words and whenever Dean would hug him or kiss him softly, promising to be with him, the expression would suddenly make sense in his mind.  
And sometimes when Dean would gesture with his hands to sit with him or lie with him and they would talk and talk, until The morning darkened, the expression got a little dimmer. But that's not important.  
When Heaven decided that they would no longer turn a blind eye to the fact that Castiel, in no way, will ever hurt the Winchesters, they found no use for him.  
It didn't even pass the angel's mind.  
The tips of his wings beginning to turn into a soft grey, slowly but surely, barely noticeable. Once they were seen Castiel put it down to the aftermath of a simple fast flight, although he did get a little twinge somewhere.  
After all, feathers were known to be delicate things, even if in reality they were the only thing most angels depended on.  
Then the grey got darker and duller until it merged into a horrid black and blossomed outwards, contaminating the others.  
And that was when he finally understood. When he realised what was happening.  
In hindsight, if he had dwelled on that twinge a little longer, he could have realised earlier.  
And, perhaps, they could have stopped it.  
Him and the Winchesters.


	2. Not a sound

The feather swirled down to the floor of the motel, landing softly, not making a sound.


	3. I could never tell you

"Castiel! You better get your feathery ass down here! I need you!"  
The flutter of wings reached Dean's ears and he swivelled around to find the angel curiously looking at him, he hadn't been able to sleep away the red that tinted the rims of his eyes.  
"Cas, are you okay?" Dean narrowed his eyes and stepped forward slowly as if he might startle the angel if he rushed.  
This just made Castiel annoyed although he could not identify why.  
Nevertheless, Castiel could barely keep eye contact before he could feel his eyes watering dangerously again.  
Those green eyes, helplessly searching, trying their hardest to figure out what was wrong, and if he just made contact, just a little glimpse. he was afraid the hunter would figure it out. It was in his nature.  
He didn't want that.  
"I'm fine" He muttered, to what he must have thought as convincing.  
"No, you're not" Was the simple response.  
And yes, he may have been right but being a burden is not what he wanted to be.  
"Of course I am, Dean. I'm always fine."  
"Don't you dare, Castiel"  
Dean's rough hands, worn from hunting, landed on each cheek and gently pulled his face, that was looking at the floor upwards so that they were now face to face.  
"Don't you dare lie to me." There was a harsh edge to his tone and the silence that followed, spoke louder than ever, the unspoken words told of all the countless times Dean had been let down, if only a little, and no matter how unintentional it had been.  
"Talk to me"  
No.  
"What did you need help with?"  
"Nothing!" Dean wretched his hands away and crossed them. "I just said that so you could come, okay?"  
"Dean, I-I'm sorry"  
Dean raised his hand, gesturing for him to stop.  
"Save it. I don't want to hear it, just tell me what's wrong"  
"Please De-"  
"Tell. Me. Please"  
His hunter was set in his ways. Needing to help was one of them. Along with many others.  
"O-okay" Castiel nodded, he could trust Dean. So, he went and sat on one of the beds, Dean following and instead of sitting laid down carefully. Cas soon followed his movements preferring to be close to Dean.  
And he told him everything


	4. But please listen.

" Look, I'm sorry, Cas, but if I'm the reason you're falling, maybe we shouldn't...this should...we should..Oh God. "  
Dean heaved a heavy sigh and sat up, making Castiel reluctantly pull away.  
"Dean, what are you trying to say?"  
"Cas, maybe..."  
"No!"  
Falling little by little meant Castiel had started to learn little things about humanity. Started identifying different emotions. It was a slow process but he was getting it. When the first feathers had fallen, the crying began because he was losing his status as an angel, some would say he was a powerful one, and it was fading. And for what? For a simple mortal man? A stubborn drunk who could barely show his emotions to anyone. But that was just it. "It" being that yes, he would die for Dean in a heartbeat and had. Because he had taught him everything he needed to know.  
And, if Dean was to break that connection...  
Well, that would cut the meaning of living for him.  
"Dean, please don't"  
"Castiel! You're falling for me! M.E! You don't deserve to stop being an angel because we're together! You've been through way too much shit already."  
You don't understand! It doesn't matter anymore because I have already lost it. My feathers have gone. The amount of feathers I lost just to come see you-"  
"EXACTLY! That's my point, Cas"  
Dean was on a roll now and had stood up rather angrily.  
"One, you're loosing your feathers, two, you lost a whole bunch of them just to come here and three, if we stop, if we forget about this relationship then maybe there's chance we can stop it. You may not have ALL your feathers but at least you have something!"  
Castiel sighed.  
"I don't want to lose this. If I had to fall for anyone, it would be you."


	5. How do I make you understand?

Only a few people understand the importance of simplicity. Simple words can either have such a small impact or a big one. Both play important roles. Especially for a man such as Dean Winchester. When he is told that he is not a broken shell of a man but a hero who has saved lives, it would be shrugged off immediately, however on the off-chance that a little of the compliment becomes believable for him, there is always another set of words that come later that manage to overpower the compliment.  
So a simple statement could make a difference sometimes.  
And it just so happened to be one of those off chances where one of the greatest hunters listened to the rapidly falling angel and realised how much he meant to him.  
Not a second too later, however, did all those years of being taught how meaningless he is came rushing in, as words of people echoed in his ears.  
Ah, but the smart angel, even though his feathers were broken and falling and his grace disappearing, the man he had come to love is the man he knows the best and so he knew that Dean would never believe that Castiel would choose him instead of being a celestial being.  
But he did.  
The decision was the best he ever made.  
All he had to do was make Dean understand.


	6. Never forget.

" Castiel! I. AM. NOT. WORTH. IT!"  
" Please, Dean. "  
" Castiel, i swear to-"  
" Listen! "  
It turns out Castiel is beginning to be a pretty stubborn human.  
" I didn't rebel for nothing. I didn't die for it to be deemed void. I . CARE. I need you to understand that. "  
He stood up abruptly and squared his shoulders.  
" Do you understand, Dean? Do you?  
The silence filled the room.  
And then;  
"...Yes."  
Quite frankly, the hunter looked stunned because it only had to be a damned angel that be the one to get through a harsh man.  
"Good."   
Dean didn't stop looking stunned, until Castiel suddenly broke into a soft smile and stepped back a little pulling Dean with him and kissed the look away.  
It worked beautifully and he made a mental note of keeping that tactic for other times.  
None of them knew when the transition went from Castiel keeping secrets to protect Dean, to drumming what Dean meant to him through his thick skull.  
Not that it mattered because from that moment everything seemed okay, whether it was to be an illusion or not, they will soon have to see, but for the time being two of the greatest men, well one of them was nearly a man, were standing together.  
The world smiled for them.  
Hoping and praying that they will never forget how crucial their existence is.


End file.
